Ducks and Penguins and Life, Oh My!

In our house, the kitchen is the central hub of activity. It is where our large family gathers to eat, share, connect and rest a moment as we all go about our hectic schedules. There on the counter, right in front of the sink where I often stand, sits a row of little rubber ducks, each with its own personality. One has a little cowboy hat, one is smaller than the others, one is always out of line, and one is not a duck at all, but a penguin. Often, visitors will ask if the ducks belong to one of my children. This generally brings about a good amount of eye rolling from said children, as I respond, "No, they are mine." Let me explain.

I placed the ducks there several years ago as a reminder to myself that no matter how much I'd like to believe it, no matter how hard I, or anyone else, tries, life will never behave itself. In other words, every time I think I've got all of my ducks in a row--business is good, marriage is good, health is good, children are good--I turn my back for a minute and one of the little buggers is acting up again. So, lest I forget, I bought myself a little row of rubber ducks, placed them in front of me on the counter and made sure one of them is always out of line. Should some well-intentioned interloper put my rebel duck back in line, I make sure to return him to his rightful place.

Now about the penguin. I added the penguin to the row of ducks after a series of unexpected events rocked my world. He serves to remind me that life is unpredictable and that no amount of planning, obsessing, or controlling is going to change that. Nope, you just can't plan for a penguin.

These reminders are so important because it is very tempting to think that happiness, success, confidence and well being are static states. That if we are unable to attain them, unable to arrive, so to speak, then there is something intrinsically wrong with us. But happiness, success, confidence, and well being are not static states. They are processes. In fact, there is nowhere to arrive, no place to sit back and say, "Whew, that was hard, but now that I've arrived, I can coast from here on out."

Life itself is a process that unfolds in ways that we cannot begin to imagine or plan for. Instead, we can work to stay centered, to regain our equilibrium when the penguin comes to call and, above all, to ENJOY those times when the penguin is out of town, all the little ducks line up in a row and the sun shines down upon us!